(no subject)

[phineasjones]

::world-weary sigh:: not even, though. just work-weary. i really, really want to not have to go there any more. really soon. wah. i hope today is slower, at least. so i can write some and job search some and all that. though i did some job searching yesterday and as usual came up with crap. this job is good for reminding me how bad it can be, though. just about anything would be better. though the pay doesn't suck as bad as it could. i shouldn't have looked at the temp agency bill though. because i saw that, after my taxes are taken out, they're taking in twice as much as i'm making. wah.

i'm going to do my best to have a very positive attitude about singing this evening. i really adore these pieces - settings of katha pollitt poetry. i just don't want those bizarre attack-nerves to come out of wherever it is they hide and get me again. what's that anti-nervous drug opera singers take? i should look in to that.

it's august. dude. and my 3 point plan is for shit. i need to get a move on.

i've been thinking... about lj and time and... well, i would love some advice. i'm just thinking about the amount of time i give to lj and now with work taking up so much time as well and the two not being able to overlap at all... and all the things i need to do like find a job etc...

i'm thinking i might take a hiatus from lj.

wah. it makes me want to cry just to look at that sentence. and i'm only talking about, like, a week. nothing overly dramatic. except that the mere thought makes me panicky and clingy. it's so much a part of my life and my routine at this point. but i really don't want to let it get in the way of other things i need to be doing.

the biggest reason i'm wary, i think, is that i understand the concept of personal support networks and it seems somewhat counterintuitive to take one of those away just when i'm doing things that require support.

but i don't think there's a good middle-ground for me with lj use. i think i could tell myself, 'this is no-lj week.' and would stick to it. but i don't think, 'try to spend less time on lj this week,' would work.

so, i don't know what advice i'm asking for. should i do it? have you? did you survive? (i'm mostly joking. ha. haha.)

also, i would miss you all. and there are so many of you, catching up would be pretty much impossible. and i'm so clingy. it's against my nature to just let go and not pay attention for a week.

but. this may be necessary. so. i don't know. thoughts?

Comments

[phineasjones.livejournal.com]

um, ok! that sounds pretty ideal. :)