encounters with the minister
Nov. 26th, 2002 12:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
phineasjonesbelated waves to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
delirieuse, earthquake1906 and impudent_rabbit. hi!
so, just got back from the church staff meeting. interesting moment at the end when it was just the minister and i. she's doing a service in february on relationships and intimacy... she was thinking some musical theater pieces might be appropriate...
her: since it's about intimacy and relationships, it would be great if we could have male/female duets.
me: inside: fuck you, again? we're supposed to be a gay friendly congregation yet every time we do anything about love or sex, it's totally male/female relationships that are displayed. but i won't say anything right now, i just want to get out of here
outwardly: ::unintentionally visible bristling:: yeah, great.
her: you don't like that idea?
me: no, it's good.
her: but you don't like something, what is it?
me: well... just because it's about relationships, doesn't me mean it has to be male/female.
her: oh my god, i'm so sorry. you're so right. of course. sorrysorrysorrygushgush. blush.
(i thought she might cry)
me: s'ok. don't worry about it. inside:i just want to go home now!
the two things that bug me about this are:
1. disappointment in myself that i didn't just speak right up, that she had to push me to voice my valid criticism
2. why the fuck should i have to remind her of this? she's a UU minister sitting across from a lesbian. and this didn't even cross her mind? ergehrgeh. she makes me crazy.
delirieuse, earthquake1906 and impudent_rabbit. hi!so, just got back from the church staff meeting. interesting moment at the end when it was just the minister and i. she's doing a service in february on relationships and intimacy... she was thinking some musical theater pieces might be appropriate...
her: since it's about intimacy and relationships, it would be great if we could have male/female duets.
me: inside: fuck you, again? we're supposed to be a gay friendly congregation yet every time we do anything about love or sex, it's totally male/female relationships that are displayed. but i won't say anything right now, i just want to get out of here
outwardly: ::unintentionally visible bristling:: yeah, great.
her: you don't like that idea?
me: no, it's good.
her: but you don't like something, what is it?
me: well... just because it's about relationships, doesn't me mean it has to be male/female.
her: oh my god, i'm so sorry. you're so right. of course. sorrysorrysorrygushgush. blush.
(i thought she might cry)
me: s'ok. don't worry about it. inside:i just want to go home now!
the two things that bug me about this are:
1. disappointment in myself that i didn't just speak right up, that she had to push me to voice my valid criticism
2. why the fuck should i have to remind her of this? she's a UU minister sitting across from a lesbian. and this didn't even cross her mind? ergehrgeh. she makes me crazy.
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devil's advocate re: evil minister
Date: 2002-11-26 05:39 pm (UTC)Re: devil's advocate re: evil minister
Date: 2002-11-26 09:19 pm (UTC)she can have that half point. fine. i already said i wish i had spoken out on my own.
but whatever. she deserves no defence here. she said something stupid. the fact that she said it to me makes it insensitive to boot. but it would have been a stupid thing to say regardless of the sexuality of the listener. i just meant i could have been a reminder to her. but she was being dense. her apology was a little much, but she did fuck up pretty badly. for a UU minister to say that something about relationships should be male/female? bad form.
(no subject)
Date: 2002-11-27 01:42 am (UTC)Re:
Date: 2002-11-27 07:13 am (UTC)::shakes hand::
nice to have you here.
(no subject)
Date: 2002-12-13 10:24 pm (UTC)