some days the line i walk turns out to be straight

[phineasjones]

i'm keeping my church job. that much i know now. my little poll and your comments helped me decide - especially bonibaru's which made me think and argue and realize just how much i want to keep the job. but even if you lot had failed to convince me, yesterday may have done it. yesterday should have been annoying. the choir didn't sing in the service but i had to be there anyway to lead an extra catch up rehearsal for the mozart and go to the 'commitment' luncheon afterward to lead the choir in a little song. it should have been annoying because it meant sitting through the service when i wasn't actually working.


but. first of all, all kinds of people showed up for the rehearsal who didn't really need the extra work. and george - the organist - came and played though he certainly didn't have to. then, in the service, george (who's been the organist at the church for 49 years) and his wife ruth did a reading. after that was the beginning of the sermon in which the minister mentioned all these older people in the church and their various good deeds... well, i was just thinking about how i haven't really known any of my grandparents all that well. i've known them... but mostly on a rather surface level. at the church, i'm surrounded by people who are of that generation and i realized as george was speaking that i... well, does it sound weird to say i love them? not like i would love a grandparent, but like a mentor or... i don't know. they're such incredibly wonderful people. and it's especially good to meet people 70 and older who are liberal and progressive and outspoken.

then, during the lunch i sat with some of the middle aged crowd. they were rowdy and silly and funny. and then little meg murray (seriously, that's her name) came over to tell me about a knitting project she has planned and wanted to know if i would help. (ok, she's not so little actually... she 13 and she's taller than i am).

and when i think about it... i've never had these kinds of rewarding relationships with people of such varied age and all. and this year, when i've done so much pulling away from other people in my life - sometimes it feels like closing in on myself - to realize that i have a place where i've put myself out and been welcomed... i don't know what i'm saying. just that it felt really good to be there yesterday. and maybe this is more special to me bc i didn't grow up in a church.

i still don't know if i would call myself a unitarian universalist. i tend to think not. but i also think i would join a church someday - esp when i have children (someone told me a little joke yesterday - what is a UU? answer: an atheist with children.) and i'm not saying that wealthy, white, mostly straight suburbia is my ideal location for work or fellowship or anything. but there are some great people there, and i like it. and i'm keeping that job.

Comments

old people

[hominidj.livejournal.com]

people over 70 who are liberal, progressive and outspoken are the coolest. i don't actually know any, but i would like to. although old people are intimidating because they've done so much.

Re: old people

[phineasjones.livejournal.com]

the old people i know tend to be more intimidating to me because of what they're still doing. this guy bill, for example, is "retired." he works a little in the symphony hall archives, volunteers with kids and everyone who needs something, is constantly at the church - i'll come in a random tuesday morning and bill's tightening the screws on the pews, someone forgets they signed up for coffee hour, bill's got it covered. he's on the music committee, the lay ministry committee... we need rehearsal space, we use his house. etc etc. the man is a force for good, straight up. and does more now in his 70s than i ever have. or likely will.

old people

[emriver.livejournal.com]

I find myself wanting to ask your grandparents questions about war - both your grandparents fought in one, one grandmother lived through it here (before marriage), and the other lived in a bombed city, either through the bombing and/or evacuated to the countryside beause of it. A lot of experience I wouldn't mind tapping into.

Re: old people

[phineasjones.livejournal.com]

yeah, i think about that too. most of these older men in the choir and in the church served in wwii.

seems easy enough to get papa to talk about his army days though, *g*.

[dancingrain.livejournal.com]

I'm glad for you - you do seem to love this job so much.

The multigenerational aspect is one thing I like about the choir I'm in a lot, too. At our performance yesterday one woman asked me if my friend Leah and I were bothered by being the only people in the older than high school, younger than 40 age group. My response was that the diversity in age of the choir is one of the things we like best about it. Especially with our own parents in other states, it's nice to know folks of older generations - and when else do i ever get to talk with high school kids? Still not enough elderly people in my regular life though - your post makes me think about that more.

Re:

[phineasjones.livejournal.com]

thanks.

that's one great thing about choirs. i'm glad you have that too. it's not something i thought much about til i noticed that i had these relationships and they're unique in my life and i have so much affection for these people. it's great.